nopantsdance

101 things about me.. seems like a lot.. until i really think about it. It would be impossible to write about all of my inspirations, lessons, journeys, and thoughts in only 101 bullets. Which is why i’m looking forward to writing more of these posts as time goes on and i learn more. I think it will help me get to know myself better as well as guide me on my journey, remind me of important insights, and give the world a peek into my whimsical life. @gcrush has posted one of these before on bohocrush as well as some recent insights to bohocrush and another on her gcrush blog. she is inviting others to do the same. so here goes:

101. i am a pervert.. openly.. but i do not act on my perversion out of hunger. i wait.. am waiting.. will continue to wait until a find a person who i want to fulfill my desires, and then i will give in and become their slut.
*i love porn, my hands, vibrators, and dildos.

100. i believe that kindness and the human spirit can transcend greed, hate, fear, and doubt.

99. when i commit to something i give everything that i can in that moment.. for the good and the bad.. i will be a part of the process, relationship, project.. all the way or not at all. I am not going to hide when the hard times roll around.. i want to be a part of the solutions.

98. “We are the music makers, and we are the dreamers of dreams” -Willy Wonka

97. i welcome change.. i love change.. it keeps life new and exciting.. from changing the way i think before i fall asleep every night to taking on new adventure in new places.. BUT i also know it must be balanced with unchanging variables. so i choose change carefully.

96. as inspired by the manifestations of @gcrush and @bohocrush .. i want to see sigur rós at burning man 2010.. lets make that happen..

95. my life’s journey is lead by my pursuit of love. to love all creatures for what i perceive them to be.

94. if i focus on my inner dream.. my outer dream will change accordingly.

93. Love is saying “I feel differently,” instead of “You’re wrong.”
- Anonymous
*i agree

92. i never knew what i could do before i tried doing it. i don’t want fear of any sort to keep me from doing.. from living.

91. i practice patience every day. this patience is rewarding me with clarity, questions, inspiration, answers, and love.

90. although i am comfortable being alone in life.. i would much rather share my journey with a community of open minded, loving, sexual, blissful beings.

89. i balance my goals with my accomplishments.. reminding myself in times of lesser successes that i have overcome hurdles before and “what can be done will be done”.
* i also believe i can do anything ; )

88. i have my mind set on learning to teleport and bi-locate.

87. i am grateful every day for all things, people, places, thoughts, wishes, gifts, sorrows, deaths, loves, loses.. and i am no more grateful for any One over another. i am no more grateful today than i was yesterday or will be tomorrow.

it’s equal.

86. i really do believe with all illusions of my being that Love is the answer.

85. life is as easy or as hard as i believe it to be.

84.
Bjork is a beautiful soul.. amazing artist.. she is as alien as they come which pretty much makes her my hero.. that and her epic melodies. i adore her music.

This song and video always makes me think of @bohocrush

83. i’ve never really done any drugs.. that’s not to say that i never will and i do not judge anyone who chooses to. it simply wasn’t time for me to delve into a world of that sort of mind expansion. I’ve chosen to grow this far without it.. the future holds many options with an open mind : )

82. if i have something i want to accomplish it helps me to always be reminded of it.. to have it posted in view so i see it every day. it may seem silly, but it helps me stay focused. having an idea or wanting to make a change is awesome, but it means nothing to me unless i actually attempt or succeed at accomplishing it.

** One reason i’m writing this is to have a record of things that i love and to keep myself inspired and reminded of the things that root me in who i am.

81. i know that the way i live my life is right for me.. and it may not be the right way for anyone else BUT me…
i am open and respectful to other people’s truths and it has allowed me to gain insight into my own journey.

80. perfection is not a path i seek to travel. if i were to perfect something there would be nothing for me to learn, contribute to, or practice whatever it was that i achieved. the joy i get from life is in part due to how imperfect it is. There is always something to be achieved or learned.

79. i hope that some day i will always radiate kindness. in the face of stress, discomfort, turmoil, or pure bliss.. kindness.. it’s the easiest way to open a mind.

78. i am a happy woman. this doesn’t mean that i don’t have issues or things to overcome in my life, it simply means i choose to deal with them with a smile. Today.. i am alive and no matter what… that is worth smiling about.

77. if something is difficult, then i tell myself it’s easy and it surprisingly seems to make things easier. There are things in life that must be done in order to accomplish your goals, life wishes, dreams.. and along that path of accomplishment i have been tested with difficult tasks, the more i resist these difficulties the harder it is for me to progress, but the less i resist.. the more i go with the flow.. the easier the “difficulties” become.

** i’ve also discovered that the more fear i have.. the more i resist. I don’t fear failure.. it teaches me what to do different next time.. i don’t fear embarrassment.. i am me.. and i love it. and because of this.. my life has become lighter.

76. Unconditional love.. sounds easy right? If someone i loved told me that they no longer wanted to be in my life.. for any given reason.. could i smile and tell them “i love you unconditionally and my only want for you is happiness” and then let go of them completely without attachment? i don’t know.. i’ve never had this happen, but it is where i’d like to be. I am on a journey and part of it is teaching myself to love other humans UNconditionally and also allow myself to detach from them enough to let them follow their paths.

75. I am the only person who can demand something of myself, so i will not allow myself to be swayed by what society thinks it can demand of me.

74. i’m not a robot.. i’m an alien. hahaa in other words.. i don’t do what i’m told.. i do what i like. i cannot be programmed to do anything i don’t want to do. and i come in peace

73. Not everything is clear to me. I am challenged with life’s situations. Before i can go further i will need to prove to myself that i cannot be held down by those that challenge me, but that i can move forward through life’s challenges and learn from them. Maybe then my illusions will become clearer.

72. Death makes me happy to be alive. We are all connected by our vulnerability to death.. the unknown.. but it is why I should be good to others. Death is why i want to be light in life. There is no end for me. every day is rejuvenation.. a chance to do it different.. to do more.. try harder.. be happier. i think this way because death does not scare me.. it motivates me to find the brightest lights in my path.

71. i believe in everything.. all things “fiction” and all things “fact”. if i didn’t believe in it all, then i would be limiting the possibility of “it” existing. To limit my thoughts, beliefs, awareness.. is to limit what could be.

70. I can’t give you anything but love.

69. to manage my time i need to look at what i am accomplishing on a monthly, weekly, hourly, every moment.. it all counts. There isn’t a moment to waste on anything self loathing or unproductive. Productive may mean something different to me.. but that may be another post.

68. i want to do more. I am asking myself what else can i do? how can i help? i don’t want to ask everyone else what to do because it is not the responsibility of anyone to tell me what to do or to hold my hand down my path. If i want to be a part of someone’s vision then i need to make myself optimal on all levels so that i am not always relying on others to guide me.

67. I am not lonely because i need a love to fill a missing place in my life. I am lonely because there is a part of me that i will only give to a lover.. partner.. boyfriend.. girlfriend…
and not having someone to give that part of me to creates difficulties within me. I am trying to recycle this loneliness into something else.. something more efficient.. perhaps something i can give to everyone.

66. I am not living alone in the world. I am one of many and as many we are one. My intentions may be different than yours and theirs, but there is love inside of everyone.

65. i have made a jump into uncertainty. it’s the best decision i have ever made. The unknown is a limitless life to live. I’m done wasting time.

64. Communication and honesty.. two things that i keep in the foreground of my actions, thoughts, and words. I don’t care to play games with anyone. The quickest way to bliss is to be forthcoming and live my truths.

63. i love that my parents have been supportive of any project i’ve come up with haha

62. i have a weakness for dorky men. sweet, sexy, smart, artistic, dorky men. who aren’t afraid to dance and kiss a woman with conviction. i know there’s one out there for me haha.

61. a few artists who blow my mind with their music:
*Random Rab
*Bassnectar
*sigur rós
*Daedelus
*Auditory Canvas
*Nosaj Thing
* El Papa Chango (Does he have a website? something other than facebook?)
*Bjork
*Kraddy
*Souleye
*Blvd
*Beats Antique
*Ana Sia

I could list a bazillion, but those few are the ones who always smear a nice layer of brains on the wall. *SPLAT*

60. i have a pink double dildo. I’ve never used it with another girl, but i have it so that i can.

59. There are a few songs that will stick with me for my forever.. Enigma “Return to Innocence” will been one of those songs. I love the lyrics.

Love, devotion
Feeling, emotion

Don’t be afraid to be weak
Don’t be too proud to be strong
Just look into your heart, my friend
That will be the return to yourself
The return to innocence

If you want, then start to laugh
If you must, then start to cry
Be yourself, don’t hide
Just believe in destiny
Don’t care what people say
Just follow your own way
Don’t give up and use the chance
To return to innocence

That’s not the beginning of the end
That’s the return to yourself
The return to innocence

58. i agree with Ziggy Marley .. Love is my religion.

57. when i’m sad i like to curl up in bed, close my eyes, and imagine a pea sized light floating in my solar plexus.. glowing a faint blue and growing in size as it shines brighter and transitions colors to violet. i imagine this light to be warm and soothing. as it grows if fills my entire body until it seeps out and i begin feeling lighter.. as if the light has become water and i am now floating in a brilliant pool of purple light until i fall asleep and wake feeling at peace with the sadness and full of love.

56. i used to be easily wounded. i’ve been cheated on.. by a few guys, and i remember feeling like it was all my fault.. like something was wrong with me and i wasn’t good enough. i am happy to say that i no longer think that way.. i find it bizarre that i would ever give myself that much credit ; )
if someone chooses to act in a way that is filled with anything but love and happiness, then that issue sits within them and is in no way related to me.

55. i love cock and pussy. I think men and women are both beautiful, sexual, enticing creatures and i wouldn’t put one over the other when thinking of a partner. i would love a woman just as i would love a man. i look forward to someday having both in my life at once.

54. I wasn’t allowed to wear makeup as a girl so i used to lock myself in my grandma’s bathroom and play with her Avon stash and pretend i was taking a bath. I don’t know if i liked doing it because it was “against the rules” or if i just wanted to play, but i believe it was a planted seed that grew into my passion for creating art with other people’s faces and bodies. If you could see the amount of loving energy that flows from my body when i’m creating you would probably go blind. it makes me so happy to give this way.

53. Sam Brown kicks ass.
i heart explodingdog.com
06.04.09
The sun is out, lets go exploring:

52. i retreat. when i’m dealing with issues that require me to rise up and be my highest self, i have to pull in and process. i try to keep things to myself and a smile on my face. i find that this deflects drama and allows me to asses the situation and respond without a negative emotional response.

51. i LOVE zombie movies and vampire movies, but i do not care for scary movies.

** speaking of vampires: I LOVE True Blood

50. I wouldn’t say that i have any particular style, i like to look different every day, but i LOVE to dress up in a pin up fashion. i love how simple and clean it is, but strikingly beautiful with deep red lips on milky skin. I swoon for a rockabilly girl. mmMm and a guy with slick hair and cuffed jeans and a pearl button shirt. *le sigh*

49. I am learning to acknowledge other people’s perspectives. it helps me communicate my truth so I can keep from making assumptions. Perspective is a large part of any story, situation, illusion, fantasy.. communication helps me understand and further open my mind.

48. pussy.
P. i like it when you gently suck on my clit. Not too hard… and massage my clit with your tongue as you suck and pull on my pussy.

U. i like it when you slowly rub my pussy until i’m so wet that my pussy is dripping.

S. it has been too long since my pussy has been properly played with.

S. i like to post photos of my pussy on the internet : )

Y. i would like to know what other people would like to do with my pussy.. or someone else’s pussy.

47. boobies. I LOVE to have my boobies played with, rubbed, sucked nibbled, pinched, and squeezed (not too hard) i prefer a firm massaging squeeze rather than a hard painful squeeze. if your hands are ever on my boobies.. i will let you know how i like it.

46. It’s easy to build an idea of who I think someone may be based on their creations, lyrics, melodies, photos, or quick encounters. My view of an individual is only 1 perception of them, but it’s important to me to get to know them and not make assumptions. Communication is a relationship that best helps me understand my desire for others.

45. I wonder if i would still have fears if i knew how i was going to die. As far as i believe, I am not afraid to die. If I am not afraid to die, then why do i still have fears? i suppose it’s a good thing that i am aware of my fears and would like to overcome them. Perhaps that’s the first step to the next thing.. something that i am not aware of yet.

44. I know my mind will need to be prepared for the quest, but i would like to live in silence. Perhaps a year, a month, a few years, or a couple of days will pass, and i would continue living amongst friends and strangers who speak while i remain silent. I think this may help me become a better listener.

43. “The National Science Foundation’s “Tree of Life” project estimates that there could be anywhere from 5 million to 100 million species on the planet, but science has only identified about 2 million.”

Given the ability, I would shape shift into all known and unknown species. I would like to see the world and live in as many perspectives as i possible and hope that i would return to my human nature and still be aware of the knowledge and perspective of all species. This would be a beautiful life to me.

42. I am the scientist of my own life. I create my own reality and it is unique and separate AND connected to any other reality that any other person will ever experience. It is connected because at the smallest form of our existence… we are one. Because I am human, my reality and perspective is different than any other human.

41. I am still learning how to respect other people’s time and space. To not interrupt their space physically or mentally when I have something i need from them. I’m being more aware of approaching them in the right moment rather than running to them as soon as i am aware of a “need”.

40. Every day i find a new appreciation for life. Small, big, easy, or difficult, every day i am finding something new to love about life.

39. I was an emotional teenager. I recall laying on my bedroom floor with my headphones on listening to Oasis -Wonderwall (on repeat) feeling like i needed to find myself and create something amazing from the mess i was in.

38. This diary belongs to Souleye. I enjoy so much of it so often. I’m excited that he will be back to reno with BLVD October 9th.. and random rab (squeeeeeel)

37. I also have a few tumblr blogs. All the links to these blogs are on my links page.

36. I play on twitter. You can play with me: @NoPantsDance

35. I LOVE avocado. a LOT! my favorite is avocado with veganese mayo on a sprouted wheat bagel with fresh ground pepper. I could eat this deliciousness every day. mmmMmM

34. sometimes i wear garters and thigh highs under my jeans.

33. A bike, a laptop, and internet access are 3 things i would choose to not live without.

32. i have never owned a car. In fact.. i haven’t driven a car in 5 years. Some people don’t understand this.. that’s ok.

31. Random Rab is my favorite artists. I have a giant crush on him.
The first minute of this video is silent.
The energy that is recycled through the creation of rab’s music to the listener’s ears is cosmically beautiful.

30. I am building a strong relationship with my body and my health. It takes work.. every day. I’m nowhere near where i’d like to be in the building of this relationship, but i’m not in a hurry to make it all happen RIGHT now.. change takes time. i’m focusing on being aware and listening to what my body needs.

29.

28.

27. i am addicted to dark chocolate..
this kind specifically:

Alter Eco is, so far, my favorite chocolate.. ever.

26. I am currently experiencing relationship karma and i am learning so much from it. I am thankful for being single and allowing myself time to reflect and learn. This life is mine and i am going to experience myself so that i may be a better lover, friend, partner, and energy for whomever takes on this journey with me.

25. Nausicaa of the valley of the wind is one of my all time favorites.. if you haven’t seen it i highly suggest it.

24. i am learning to make fractals and digital art. it’s something i’ve always wanted to learn and now i’m teaching myself. my friend @indigothirdeye makes BEAUTIFUL fractal art.. like this..

23. i love to sew and create things from recycled materials and old clothing. old to new.

22. i have had many pets, my favorites were: Rocky (snake), Rosie & Max (tarantulas), Pinocchio (needle nose gar). I am currently pet free… i intend to stay this way so that i may travel at ease : )

21. I find so much joy in creating and collaborating on bohocrush photo shoots
. It’s an experience and opportunity that has changed my life and i am forever grateful for their willingness to let me run wild with hair and makeup.. wardrobe.. styling.. and concepts.

20. For My Corpse lyrics
Rain
Honey and Wine

And you know I will be waiting
By the blossoms of curling trees
Only here will my sleep redeem me
Only here will my corpse smell sweet

currently my favorite song by random rab

19. My favorite rainy day movies are The Blue Planet and Planet Earth DVD sets. I was gifted them and treasure every piece of earth knowledge i repeatedly absorb when i watch them.

18. I started off this year with the intention to get to know more about myself and honor my happiness without sacrificing my bliss to please others. I am enjoying this gift to myself. This time will fill me with love and understanding so that when i do fill my life with a relationship, i will be well rooted in myself and free to love uninhibitedly.

17. I’m exploring my sexuality at the moment, and oddly enough i’m not having any sex hahaa. I’m seeking a connection with a man or woman that is making an effort to be their highest self. I am a choosey lover. so whether it is simply for fun or intended to fuse with my bliss for an extended period of time, i’m waiting to connect on a personal level before we connect on a hot nasty naked penetrating level : )

16. There is an overwhelming and beautiful energy in nature. I love to get my hands dirty.. sink my toes deep into the mud.. bury my body in sand and let water wave across my body.. wind soaring me higher from my body. I am always lifted and grounded when i’m outdoors. I love this planet so much!

15. I don’t ever want to have children. I think that is a great thing to know. There are so many other people in the world making families. I’m happy to know that i don’t want to be a parent.

14. I believe that a smile is the most beautiful thing a person can wear. It was easy for me to get caught up in my head and lose my approachability simply because I look upset, mad, or not in the moment. I try to smile or keep my facial expression as soft as possible. I want to connect with people and make friendships.. especially with my friends on the internet so i figure the best way to do that is make it easy for you to say hello if you ever see me. ♥

13. I have a bath tub fantasy that i have yet to fulfill…
a tub comfortably big enough for at least two .. hot steamy water with a window cracked to keep the air moving through the room.. coconut and lavender oil in the water. there is something so sensual about cleaning your lover(s) before you take them. Slowly rubbing, sucking, and massaging all parts of the body in anticipation of penetration.

12. I prefer to have music on while making love, fucking, gettin down.. etc. it sets the mood for me. I haven’t had a lover to try it out with, but i look forward to listening to random rab’s latest album aRose while i spend an entire evening licking, rubbing, sucking, spanking, fucking.

11. cigarette smoke is really gross.. cigarette smoke i hate the most! I have nothing against people who smoke, that’s their decision to do so, but i very much dislike the smell of cigarette smoke. I like to go out and listen to my favorite dj, band, artist etc. and dance until the sun comes up, but if the venue is full of smoke, i generally count myself out.

10. i love having my hair brushed, and played with. My entire body relaxes and my thoughts fall silent. I love to drift off to asleep while my hair is so lovingly played with.

9. i want to learn to surf.. to connect with the ocean in such an awesome way.. by riding its waves.

8. I have a sort of fear of the ocean that i will overcome. i have always had a fear of sharks, but there is this humbling sense of power that falls on me when i’m in the ocean. i suppose i need to see it more as a respect for the powerful mass around me rather than a fear of it. That energy can be so filling if I choose to let it flow through me rather than reject it. I think i just need to swim with sharks to deal with my fear of them. Karina Petroni describes it best..

7. I haven’t had much time with the Ocean but i love the way it sounds. I like to sit outside in a breeze and listen to the trees rustle all of their leaves. The gusts of wind simulate waves and force the trees to become my ocean. It takes me to another place.

6. Once in a while there will be a song that will, for a fleeting moment, pull out a sorrowful memory. Pink floyd -Wish You Were Here is one of those songs.

5. i love the moon. As many others have, I have told many secrets to the moon and recycled so much energy while laying under her in admiration.. The moon is a powerfully hypnotic body. I will make the moon one stop on my cosmic adventure.

4. when done correctly, i can be spanked into orgasm. both sides must play a role and it must be done with the most loving, positive, and satisfying energy. Ask me about it some time and perhaps i’ll tell you the method to my ass madness.

3. i am addicted to dancing.. really.. once i start dancing i don’t want to stop. i will dance until my knees are swollen and i can’t physically stand up anymore. i don’t care how sweaty i get.. i’ll take off some clothes to cool down. dancing is my drug of choice. i will stay up for 2 days and never stop dancing.. i did it at The Big Bounce this year. I ended my dancing binge with Random Rab’s morning set on the beach and then passed out on the way home. it was bliss : ) i spent the next 2 days icing my elevated knees hahaha.

2. i am filled with delight to be surrounded by growing plants. The rich green glistening wax like leaves are more beautiful than any human creation. I send them love always.

1. i used to be afraid of life: I was constantly worried about whether or not i was doing the right things to be an “accomplished member of society”.. what the hell does that even mean?! now.. I’m doing what makes me happy… and i’m not afraid of how that makes the world think of me.

I was recently asked via dm on twitter what the perfect man would be to me. My first thought was “there is no such thing as perfect”. We are always growing and evolving.. learning and making mistakes. I have never been on a path to find the perfect man. After quite a bit of thought i decided this:

He will be perfectly imperfect.. to me.
A creative spirit.. an artist.. always finding inspiration in the world around him, worlds unknown, and in worlds of the past. He would be of similar mindset as me when it comes to “work”.. we would find bliss in any journey we choose, but would not go about the world in any “normal” behavioral patterns. No 9-5 job to keep us limited. He would understand that it’s good to “be hungry” always searching for new and old to push us beyond our life limits.
he would sleep and wake with me as we were tired and awake, refusing the possibility of waking up at the same time every day to an alarm. In this way we would respect our bodies and their need to rest.
He would be connected to his body in many aspects. Listening to its animal urges and fuck me passionately whenever our hearts desired. I want a man who can look at me in line at the grocery store and decide he has to have me in the parking lot because home is a little bit TOO far away. There is no room for fear in a relationship with me.. there is just too much to enjoy about each other.
He would be my best friend. We would turn to one another to talk out our uncertainties and to relish in the golden light of another sunrise spent side by side. There would be no arguments or fights because fighting is simply lashing out your self doubts on an undeserving party. Communication would be the underlying foundation to our entire ralationship. Love, sex, decisions, simple things such as what to eat for breakfast or if he’s too tired to have sex.. all things big and small can avoid argument with proper communication and with each other we would learn the best way to communicate our needs and desires.
He would need to be open to whatever sexual exploits i wanted to delve in to. i would never make him take one for the team, but i will not let my sexuality be hindered by his insecurities or fears. In turn i would be open to his sexual desires. I’ve learned that sexual relationships take time to grow and you can’t always jump into something because you think it’s what the other person wants.. this is where the communication comes in again. I want to hear every though about what ever sexual pool we dive in to. Feelings don’t need to be hurt. I am aware that hormones can take over, and that is exactly why i want a man who will think not only of his own sexual desires but of mine as well.. in a few short words… i want a man who will worship me and my pussy and i will worship him and his cock : )

I don’t believe there is one most important thing to any relationship but sex is important to me as i am a ravenously sexual woman. I am also a giant internet loving geek so he would have to be ok with that too. No matter where we take our light in the world i would want to be capturing our adventures on video, blog post, podcast, photos, and web cam. He must certainly not be scared to show the world himself. I am me.. every day.. in all things i do in life and on the internet.. i am myself and i won’t hide it from the world.
Some may say this seems picky or demanding, but why would i settle for a guy who makes me sacrifice what makes me happy. I could be single forever or i could find a man who will not resist the bliss. I’m not afraid to be alone. I know there is a man (and a woman..) who can handle the NoPantsDance : )

Although this is a pretty lengthy answer i have kept things pretty vague. I’m not cataloging specifics.. height, weight, hair color, that is all blah blah blah. you never know who will love until you truly know that person. That will take time, but time is relevant and situational so i prefer to keep my eyes, ears, and heart open to whatever love the universe shows me.

does that answer? sort of? hahaa

When i am asleep i dream..
Eyes closed i let my mind play with all of the subconscious inspirations that the universe has planted into my being.
The colors are vivid.. the smells.. sounds.. feelings are so pure.
Dreaming has become a drug for me.
I know that this inspiration will find a body. right now i’m struggling to put words, sounds, explanations to the things the universe is showing me. Wishing i could place a camera in my mind and show you where i go when i sleep.

when i am awake i dream..
open or closed my eyes process what i see. nose to smells. ears to sounds. body to feelings..
There is a world around me that i wasn’t aware of. Even when i was awake my channels were closed. i wasn’t allowing anything in.
but now..
I am finding inspiration from everything i focus on

a bird. a feather. a bolt. a breeze. a beat. a laugh.
light. sky. sun. trees. flowers blooming. stars dying. bees working. muscles twitching. a pet’s call for attention. colors changing. water moving. temperature rising. the earth cooling. warming. global interaction through the movement of molecules. nails growing. faces aging. bass pulsing. his voice. her voice. our voices blending together making the most blissful note. pitched perfectly to be heard only by those making it. inaudible to the world at large.
super power. layers upon layers building inspiration fitting together.. a puzzle with no picture on the box. always changing. malleable by thought.
instantaneous reaction. Electromagnetic forces forming molecules. exchanging love and light.
Transient blue-shifted absorption.
covalent bonds between strangers. a mysterious connection of love on a molecular level.
I may never know you but i love you. because we are connected through life and through death.. and because there is no greater thing in life to me than to give and receive love.

I’m slowly learning how to capture my inspiration and use it towards something that i can share. elated. life is a beautiful gift. the cycle of living and dying..
loving, giving, receiving.. all of the feelings, thoughts, and desires in between are bliss. so thankful!

What a beautiful day at the nude beach yesterday. we spent the afternoon in the sun, sand, and water waiting for the sun to get lower in the sky before we started @pmimmy’s bohocrush photo shoot. She is such a beautiful goddess.. so happy to get to know her.

Elated was the word of the day. exultant!

i can’t yet put words to where my bliss is leading .. all i can do is smile and share photos.
: ) #bliss

enjoy.

: ) well i almost forgot.. i wanted to share these little Qik videos of our hike the other day. I’ve gone through a wind tunnel of growth in the last few days. I’m feeling so thankful for the path i’m on. Sending love and gratitude.

enjoy.

everything felt like magic!

Again.. it’s hard to get the beauty across with an iphone camera, but i feel the need to capture these moments of inspiration so that i may go back and reflect when i’m feeling stuck or need a reminder of where my bliss shines : )

Even the smallest things in nature bring me so much joy. I was so excited to see this little waterfall. I’ve been drawn to water lately.. calmed by it’s voice and soothed by it’s blanketing touch. Feeling new.

it was so inspiring to be out in nature today! I went on a hike with sho and g and it was just what i needed.  Surrounded by the life of  trees, birds, flowers, wild grasses, damp meadow floors, beautiful rainbow spectrum of flowers, and the buzz of tiny bugs going about their day.

I found a lot of inspiration from the fallen trees around me. The gentle giants who had met their maker and fallen to create more life. Each tree  trunk decomposing in geometric patters. cubes. smaller and smaller the longer it lays there. Some of them worn smooth by the weather creating a metallic almost silk texture that i could not capture in a photo. I brought my iphone and captured a few moments, but i appreciate the times when there is something so beautiful that you can only really experience their beauty in the moment with your eyes : )

Another moment of beauty. . sho & g: observing two people who are so in love was as breath taking as the meadow. They have so much warmth and bliss in their hearts it is truly a gift to be able to observe love at this level. Their bliss has been inspirational on my path and i am thankful to have their light in my life.

now that my mind is on this elated and fresh path i would love to know..
what about nature inspires you? feel free to leave a comment : ) I would LOVE to learn and share more.
when your brain is full and you need to reset. . what do YOU do for new inspiration? : )

love!

I’ve been thinking a lot lately about the little things i do on a daily basis..which lead and build on the bigger things i do on a daily basis.. which also lead to the little and big things that i DON’T do on a daily basis.. both good and bad..

We are such little beings with such few requirements for survival yet some insist on making things complicated. dramatic. hard.. or some do things that make them unhappy because they “HAVE TO”.
says who?
why? when did the masses get permission to tell me yes or no? why can’t i quit my job and persue a life of beautiful artistic bliss.. doing what i WANT to do in order to get by.. survive yet still remain 100% in my bliss and live in a world i create.. i have a choice.
I gave my notice at work today. It felt like the right thing to do : ) and i’m happy with the decision.
I’ve pulled out a new focus from within myself in the last 48 hours. I know what i don’t want to be doing and i suppose that’s one step closer to discovering the path that will lead me to what i want.
at this moment i just want to be happy. and create these things that sit in my mind.. in my sexual, creative,  blissful, dancing life vault.
Well.. it’s open now.. let us see what’s inside.

i will do what i desire in order to survive. I’m not afraid. It feels good to be making decisions in my life based on what i want to do and not what everyone around me thinks i should do.
more to come..
for now.. back to random rab and Lord of the Flies
sleep sweet

The soft hum of loves instrument vibrating deep within.
Glitching at moments that can only be described as human.
the melody is constant.
underlaying as a reminder that no matter what stumbles you take
we are all the same.
a constant reminder of your roots.
not family or heritage..
who you truly are at all moments when any emotion is showing.

Always evolving and growing
planting new roots with each nutrient rich discovery.
never different not always the same.

May i make a suggestion?
Don’t pick these flowers.
Lay down.
bury yourself in this earth.
wrap my vines around your arms
roots around your legs.
grains of sand between your toes
breathe this earthly scent
hints of Lavender.. Vanilla
soak in the vibrations of loves instruments
hum.. pulsation.. a memory made deep into your subconscience
unforgettable.. this meditation brings no answers.
only recommendations.
a glimpse of what is inside this cave
often hidden.
overlooked.
kept secret.
unknown.
the purpose is not to be understood  by  all..
or any..
this reflection. rainbow. light spectrum..
comes from within me.
a looking glass into a rabbit hole.
emblazoned with light only to find darkness at the end
the finality of this path cannot be foretold.
On this journey you will have to find out on your own.

Anyone who follows me on twitter knows how big of a pervert i can be. I’m always horny and usually have my mind in the gutter, but it always keeps me smiling and feeling sexy.
I think about fantasies.. fetish.. playing.. experimenting… all the fun things i want to try with a lover. For now, I’m just thinking about it. I haven’t met anyone that i connect with enough sexually to make them my lover, play thing, or partner.
I think it’s important to choose a good lover. Chemistry is EVERYTHING but i don’t need a sex master or anything like that. When i say i want a good lover i mean a few things:
[this goes for guys and girls]

♥ a great person with an open heart- I wholeheartedly believe that being positive and having a willingness to allow love in and out of your heart is as important as breathing.

♥ open minded and willing to try new things [not just sexually]- these two things go great together. Having an open mind allows you to be accepting of, and willing to try, new things you may not have thought of trying. You never know where your bliss will lead you if you’re willing to try something new.

♥ healthy.. loves their temple.. physically and mentally- Having a healthy lifestyle physically really opens up your mind. A healthy sexual appetite is always inspiring. I want to be naked in pictures with my love.. I want to be in video with my love. Sexuality is a part of who i am and i’m not afraid of people seeing it. I want to share my love and desire with the world as well as with my lover. Being healthy goes hand in hand with my life and how i feel. feeling healthy=feeling blissful

♥ creative.. expresses their love of life by creating- People who create things are so sexy! creating in any form.. music, art, writing, hula hooping, making food, fucking, growing, geeking [hehee]. You name it.. if someone can create with love then their desire pours out of them in their craft. Take that love and intention and put it in my pussy because i wanna FEEL IT!!

♥ positive attitude.. no party poopers allowed- everyone has things happen throughout the day that they can either take on and allow them to be broken down or grumpy. Part of the art in living is to not take on things that other people dump out there. Acknowledge it and then let it go, because it is real and it’s what they are feeling, but that negativity doesn’t need to be spread. Share love and happiness not shame and irritation.

♥ not afraid to talk about their sexual needs- I want to learn and experiment. i need lovers who will teach and learn about our sexual needs together. I really wish i knew how.. BUT i can’t read minds hehee. You need to be able to tell me what you want, how you like it. when you want it, where you like it. what you want to try, what you aren’t ready for, harder, faster, slower, softer, sideways, upside down, double dong a long a ding dong. hahaha communication is key.

♥ open to adding another woman to the relationship- as i said here .. i want more love.. and i love men and women.

choosey huh!! I just can’t bring myself to share this love and this pussy with just anyone. whether it’s casual, one time, every day a few times a day, forever, or whenever we’re in the same city.. I want lovers who are aware and living their lives like i choose to live mine.. with love and positive intention.
so for now.. i will be spending a lot of time playing with my pussy while i think about fantasies.. fetish.. playing.. experimenting… and all the fun things i want to try with a lover. I’m ready for it so i know the universe will provide.
love & gratitude

there are no brilliant inspirational words to convince anyone to live a life full of love and bliss.
You choose the path you want to walk down.
Things come to you as you are ready for them.
The universe will provide as you are ready to receive.
You learn lessons from people you would have never imagined having anything in common with.
What is wrong for you may be right for someone else.
The beauty is in allowing others to experience life.
Your bliss and it’s strength are determined by you.
love life.