showering my thoughts with appreciation for these lessons, and for things i have yet to learn.
understanding that if i desire to grow, i must nurture
if i desire to learn, i must teach,
if i desire to be found, i must allow myself to seek

there is no right or wrong, only what i allow myself to perceive.
negative can be positive if that is how i allow it to be.
i can change the past with my attitude.
i can change the future with my intentions.
i can live in this moment and allow myself to grow.

breathe slow.

Awareness of self, of motivation, of desire.
one fiber in an infinitely spiraling fabric of time.
life, death, cyclical resurrections of consciousness.
a brain weighted with new information
yet remaining light as air
moving through the infinitely small, infinitely large, dense space around me.

reflecting inwards in a world that currently reflects outward.
reflecting our faults upon each other in judgments and negativity.
disconnecting from the whole to be an individual yet seeking approval from each other.

making the choice to mirror self love and universal love.
after all.. there is only one of us here.

“the universe needs you”
finding a voice, building a vocabulary.
this information feels cellular, encoded within me
i’m now learning how to speak the language.
to communicate
to express

how could i express me to myself when i wasn’t connecting in..
completely tapping in to my own portal to the universe.
looking for the world to tell me how to be and what is right.
no one really knows what is best for me. only i can find my truth.

how does a sun worshiping plant grow in an environment made dark?
Does it adapt to the new conditions and evolve into something different?
[different] positive or negative in the sense of the word.. that is a personal choice.
or does it seek another path to light..
is there familiarity.. least resistance.
is that path not seen because of a lack of insight, is that path existing in plain sight?
is it difficult to see that path simply because a choice is made not to believe?
Maybe it dies.. perhaps the way back into the light is to change form all together..
to give your matter back to the universe for use in another avenue.

living love, practicing bliss

elated.

slipping through my fingers.
anticipating that kiss that hasn’t happened
enjoying it as the thought lingers.

curiosity often kills the cat
so i’m doing my best to decipher
cryptically straight forward answers.
perplexing brevity leaves me without clarity.

an unpredicted derelict fate
a vessel soon abandoned by both
without any hope or intention of returning
left with a sweet taste of yearning

i received your message
and learned my lesson
now my choices have left me discerning.
quick to understand
that as quickly as i’ve got it
its slipped out of my hand.

the future is unknowable,
but i don’t seek that insight.
i just want to open my heart
and let in more light.

i was sitting in front of the fire last night surrounded by the laughter and chatter of by beautiful friends and boho family, when i found myself remarkably aware of how thankful i am for my journey.

I asked myself, “are you thankful every day?”
without hesitation i answered myself, “YES! i am!”

and then i wondered.. “do i live as though i am thankful every day?” and i did not have a clear yes or no answer. Although i am aware of my deepening gratitude for this adventure, the secrets of the universe, and the joys i surround myself with, i feel like i can be actively living my life with more gratitude every day.

i am making a point to give recognition and love every day. i can either share it in my online playgrounds, or i can take time to reflect in the quiet comforts of my mind. Either way, i find joy in furthering my gratitude by living it.. acknowledging it.. and sharing it.

sending out warm thoughts and love to the universe. We’re all on one amazing journey. love, light, gratitude
kendra

to live freely.. wings open with uninhibited love and desire.
knowing that what is.. only is because i believe it to be.
my reality a realization of my mind’s fantasy.
manifestations of my truths..
i believe them to be as easily as one may believe them not to be.

love.. a vessel capable of healing all.
community.. a vessel capable of love
i believe in my illusion.
enthralled to be alive. curious of what comes after.

haven’t been here before.. signs of neon warning.
blue flags directing me forward with salacious caution.
Always with a smile
a hungry heart eating its way out.
carnivorous.. eager.

an appetite for adventure,
bliss
naked sweating passion filled flurries between the sheets.
been so long i’ve begun hallucinating.
fantasy flickering in reality weaving a satisfying web.
how much longer..
will i explode?
implode?
reincarnate..

a true geek in all sense of the word..
it wants to know the answers which lead to more questions.
although confusion ensues all parts of this journey are embarked with a smile.
bumps making things in the night.
tinkering. diddeling
and i cannot see what my eyes are not ready to see

so.
more questions. more answers.
more questions. all in bliss.
there is no doubt that i am not following a map,
the cartographer of this path is within my finger tips.
tap tap.
building techniques.
gently crushing the structures beneath.
creating new depths of field
mapping photos.

controlled by the curious creature within.
the mechanics are not electric but melodic
layer upon layer of these layers
all controlling a separate movement.
“i’m a rainbow too” is maneuvering the smile which is directly linked to the bliss
with no cohesion
the connection between the two is not molecular..
it’s simply all an illusion..
one beautiful earthly illusion
powered by
desire
curiosity
sexuality
love
bliss
that little creature
melody
rhythm
chants
beat
“i’m a rainbow too”
a smile…
which in turn.. is all also an illusion.

i am making it and i am enjoying it.